Introductions

Putting together ones life with the modern world.
Post Reply
obnoxion
Sodalis
Posts: 2151
Joined: Tue May 25, 2010 7:59 pm

Re: Introductions

Post by obnoxion »

Cerastes wrote:
Wed Mar 25, 2020 5:50 pm
My strategy is simply to write what is going through my mind at this particular moment. Sometimes I realize afterwards that I'm wrong or I've expressed myself imprecisely and sometimes I like what I've written. However, I refuse to be ashamed of my missteps as they are a part of the occult work itself.
I think this is a good strategy. Some years ago I started to ignor most of my misspellings in effort to lower the bar for myself and others to take part in forum discussions.
One day of Brahma has 14 Indras; his life has 54 000 Indras. One day of Vishnu is the lifetime of Brahma. The lifetime of Vishnu is one day of Shiva.
Kavi
Frater
Posts: 394
Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 4:52 pm

Re: Introductions

Post by Kavi »

I think many might find it a bit hard to approach my posts while not knowing basic things about me as a person.
Secondly I think I have only introduced myself on Finnish forum so...

Hi, I have been member of SoA from latter half of 2016.
Originally raised in Christian household but I always had a fight with theodicy - the problem of evil. I couldn't accept it how it was thought and taught in Christian circles and I already held a pantheistic worldview even though lot of Christians see God as personal being.
Maybe it's because of my background that even today Lucifer-Christos gives me some kind of smile and conflicting emotion which I couldn't pinpoint. Is it because I find humor in it or something else and more?

I struggle to find often any meaningful way to exist but maybe I could at least exist in meaningful way to find.. a struggle... until the struggle is taken away... Many of us have some kind of designated specialization whether it's religion studies, form of physical and mental exercises, black metal or philosophy but for me finding a meaning in life has been very hard. It feels like life itself is a lie or some form of trickery. We can focus only certain goals in life until it all vanishes away. But I try to have at least some form of faith that the path I walk or exist leads to at least some form of meaning but I couldn't be certain about it. ( I think I have some kind of problem with Pride and Despair and although I feel great respect for fellow brethren's from their journey and their dharma - I feel tiny bit of envy for it too.)
I am not very active forum user these days but I try to participate in discussions as much as possible but sometimes just writing one post takes enormous amount of energy.

This went to form of exhibitionism but maybe it gave someone something to think about. :)
7&8
User avatar
Peregrina
Soror
Posts: 61
Joined: Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:35 pm

Re: Introductions

Post by Peregrina »

Kavi wrote:
Sat May 30, 2020 4:41 pm

I struggle to find often any meaningful way to exist but maybe I could at least exist in meaningful way to find.. a struggle... until the struggle is taken away... Many of us have some kind of designated specialization whether it's religion studies, form of physical and mental exercises, black metal or philosophy but for me finding a meaning in life has been very hard. It feels like life itself is a lie or some form of trickery. We can focus only certain goals in life until it all vanishes away. But I try to have at least some form of faith that the path I walk or exist leads to at least some form of meaning but I couldn't be certain about it. ( I think I have some kind of problem with Pride and Despair and although I feel great respect for fellow brethren's from their journey and their dharma - I feel tiny bit of envy for it too.)
I am not very active forum user these days but I try to participate in discussions as much as possible but sometimes just writing one post takes enormous amount of energy.
I can relate with a lot of what you wrote about in your post. I have a lot in my life that I could be passionate about but the underlying sense of futility just takes the edge off the passions. Many times I regret posting here on the forum because afterwards it seems difficult to find time and energy to continue the conversation. But I believe that once things in my life settle once again I have more time to think about the themes discussed on this forum.
Kavi
Frater
Posts: 394
Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 4:52 pm

Re: Introductions

Post by Kavi »

Malja wrote:
Sun May 31, 2020 10:14 pm
Kavi wrote:
Sat May 30, 2020 4:41 pm

I struggle to find often any meaningful way to exist but maybe I could at least exist in meaningful way to find.. a struggle... until the struggle is taken away... Many of us have some kind of designated specialization whether it's religion studies, form of physical and mental exercises, black metal or philosophy but for me finding a meaning in life has been very hard. It feels like life itself is a lie or some form of trickery. We can focus only certain goals in life until it all vanishes away. But I try to have at least some form of faith that the path I walk or exist leads to at least some form of meaning but I couldn't be certain about it. ( I think I have some kind of problem with Pride and Despair and although I feel great respect for fellow brethren's from their journey and their dharma - I feel tiny bit of envy for it too.)
I am not very active forum user these days but I try to participate in discussions as much as possible but sometimes just writing one post takes enormous amount of energy.
I can relate with a lot of what you wrote about in your post. I have a lot in my life that I could be passionate about but the underlying sense of futility just takes the edge off the passions. Many times I regret posting here on the forum because afterwards it seems difficult to find time and energy to continue the conversation. But I believe that once things in my life settle once again I have more time to think about the themes discussed on this forum.
I think Cup is very nice symbol for this what we talk about. It's good to know our energy levels and resources and use them within our capacity.
During last few years I have started to understand that some times there exists a tension or tense feeling even while writing a post and that it's very great practice of truthfulness - to try to approach things with more understandingly and honestly in relaxed state of mind. I mean when the regret or other impulses come.
I am not very familiar with meditation and these things and if it's not right and correct method but many times when anxiety exists and these outward or inward impulses seem to be present I have tried to approach them with compassion.
7&8
User avatar
Polyhymnia
Soror
Posts: 428
Joined: Mon Feb 18, 2019 7:20 pm

Re: Introductions

Post by Polyhymnia »

Kavi wrote:
Sat May 30, 2020 4:41 pm
Maybe it's because of my background that even today Lucifer-Christos gives me some kind of smile and conflicting emotion which I couldn't pinpoint. Is it because I find humor in it or something else and more?

I struggle to find often any meaningful way to exist but maybe I could at least exist in meaningful way to find.. a struggle... until the struggle is taken away... Many of us have some kind of designated specialization whether it's religion studies, form of physical and mental exercises, black metal or philosophy but for me finding a meaning in life has been very hard. It feels like life itself is a lie or some form of trickery. We can focus only certain goals in life until it all vanishes away. But I try to have at least some form of faith that the path I walk or exist leads to at least some form of meaning but I couldn't be certain about it. ( I think I have some kind of problem with Pride and Despair and although I feel great respect for fellow brethren's from their journey and their dharma - I feel tiny bit of envy for it too.)
I am not very active forum user these days but I try to participate in discussions as much as possible but sometimes just writing one post takes enormous amount of energy.

This went to form of exhibitionism but maybe it gave someone something to think about. :)
Thank you for the insight, Kavi! I find it always adds extra depth to discussion when one shares about themselves on a more personal level. I can definitely empathize with some of those feelings, myself.
"Limited love asks for possession of the beloved, but the unlimited asks only for itself." -Kahlil Gibran
Kavi
Frater
Posts: 394
Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 4:52 pm

Re: Introductions

Post by Kavi »

Polyhymnia wrote:
Tue Jun 02, 2020 7:29 pm
Thank you for the insight, Kavi! I find it always adds extra depth to discussion when one shares about themselves on a more personal level. I can definitely empathize with some of those feelings, myself.
Great to hear! I thought this was a good deed as it helps to understand at least a little bit of what kind of person is writing behind a particular pseudonym.
7&8
Post Reply