Escapistic intellectualism - I too have had my share of that. I had phobia of feelings but since then I have been forced to work with them - and now I esteem them as a vital part of my inner guiding mechanism.Cerastes wrote: ↑Wed May 20, 2020 10:34 pmSometimes I tend to think that psychological knowledge may even be a hindering when it comes to real empathy because it is a way to flee from emotions.
It‘s like an occultist who knows every book on occultism but has absolutely no occult progress.
Of course that‘s not true for everyone, only for people who have the tendency to escape in intellectualism.
Yes, I think that envy and jealousy are easily suppressed, because they carry vulnerability within them. People avoid feeling vulnerable - which is (imo) really one of the most common reasons why relationships fail. There's no real intimacy without vulnerability.Cerastes wrote: ↑Wed May 20, 2020 10:34 pmAnother possibly way to gaie somthing positive from jealousy is that it can be a good marking point for a insecurity of some sort.
For example I never was jealous in a relationship. My lack of jealousy was even called naivety from friends because I don‘t like to control anyone and I don‘t care if my partner is visiting a female friend over the weekend, for example. But I can be very jealous and envious regarding my older sister who is extremely skilled and talented in everything. So obviously there is an insecurity in my own skills I can work on.
But hardly anything is as hard to admit as ugly, greedy jealousy.
After my divorce I realised this new-found, bitter envy that I felt, looking at the "perfect" couples all deserving each other and stuff... I let the feeling just be - although I was kind of scared of the person I was becoming. But this envy helped me to realize that the image that I projected into these certain couples was really where my truest will was uncovered. I didn't want them to un-have what they had, rather I realized that they had something that I wanted for myself. These couples reflected my longing which was so suppressed that it was easier for me to feel envy before accepting that I was still having this lovingly stupid dream of finding my ultimate match.