Angolmois wrote: ↑Wed Apr 21, 2021 1:57 pm
Angolmois wrote: ↑Sat Sep 12, 2020 9:24 pmIn my situation I think this has to do with my medication which seems to block quite efficiently at least the "lower" chakras, leading to many negative side symptoms, for example lack of motivation and self will (solar plexus?), lack of sexual drive (Svadhisthana), but in the case of Ajna I think it has to do the most with smoking, which I'm trying to quit presently. The headache I've experienced is situated quite precisely in the etheric head centre between the eyebrows, maybe somewhat to the right in my forehead.
This concerns only my little self but it seems that I mistakingly associated as negative side symptoms of my neuroleptic medication what was in reality simply depression, since all these perceived symptoms have basically vanished together with depression. For long time I thought that because of my illness and medication I'm basically unfit for any real spiritual development outside ethical behavior. Things seem to have changed.
Although illness and medication can seem like a wall and yes in worst case scenario can be proven as unfit. I guess there's still lot and lot to do.
If one has ever heard how musicians express their own thoughts and absolute despair of their ambitions and goals and inability to meet them maybe it's possible to see this question a like. One decided to become professional, but antimatter of the abyss crushes the person's heart.
Focusing on learning process rather than becoming master is very important to remember too.
Taking small steps, learning to listen oneself and love oneself too.
I guess each person who is patient of illness also blames themselves because of it.
Self-reflection, medication and positive care and therapy are important. In such illnesses that make the person lose autonomy and decision making, sleeping and eating can be seen as a spiritual practice.
I can go hours without eating and go without having proper sleep and it doesn't feel that bad but I sense there's some form of violence against myself hidden beneath it.
This relates very well with some warnings of aschetism, I guess it's alright to test limits and live simple life but when you find yourself accidentally fasting without actually wanting to fast - it raises some issues!
And yes no worries sometimes having setbacks but nowadays it's easier to correct them - thanks to medication.
In my case if some of the things are dysfunctional I start to live like a rat which is quite educational but also somekind of anger rises because brains just select things from the menu for the day that might have most of the dopamine and override all other things. So maybe lust for life, anger, pride, complete despair. Especially lust seems to manifest in empty plastic cases that once were food and life - creative force is too immensely present that it seems everything turns upside down once entropy of one's shadow show up? This also seem to be more and more balanced nowadays but interesting perception at least.
I haven't thought of chakras but maybe their problems relate in someway to seven deadly sins - yet I think there is problems in completely spiritualizing all illness or dysfunctions, whereas similarly medicalization just reduces everything. Yet diagnosis is real and should be thought of as such too. If life is a spectrum then maybe some of the phenomenon are just extremes of such life?
I guess ethical life, one's code and path is good to have - some strictness and pillars needed in order to balance the fuel of chaos that is whirling inside of us. I guess some traditions try underlining that in order to focus on esoteric side, one must have exoteric path intact, although maybe it's not so black and white.
The still waters of depression might turn into too fast moving river and one ends up in rocks. Which is again I find abit tragicomical and deeply sad.
These days I feel like being jack of all trades and master of none and focus is distracted based on menu of dopamine. Maybe some form of strictness and again release in tenderness is needed but I need to learn when these things happen so this happens on right moment.